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Famous Quotes Home >> Authors Starting with G >> Quotes By Groucho Marx |
| Quote #1: | "I sent the club a wire stating, PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER." |
| Quote #2: | "Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped." |
| Quote #3: | "From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it." |
| Quote #4: | "Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough." |
| Quote #5: | "I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." |
| Quote #6: | "A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five." |
| Quote #7: | "Go, and never darken my towels again." |
| Quote #8: | "I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception." |
| Quote #9: | "I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book." |
| Quote #10: | "It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy." |
| Quote #11: | "Those are my principles, and if you don't like them... well, I have others." |
| Quote #12: | "She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon." |
| Quote #13: | "My mother loved children -- she would have given anything if I had been one." |
| Quote #14: | "Women should be obscene and not heard." |
| Quote #15: | "Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy." |
| Quote #16: | "Military justice is to justice what military music is to music." |
| Quote #17: | "Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms." |
| Quote #18: | "Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." |
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